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Hara-Kiri: Death of a Samurai

Indie Game: The Movie

Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter

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LINKS - I imagine they'll help me more than they'll help you, but here goes...

 

First the essentials: 

IMDB - proudly rendering most press kits obselete

Allmovie.com  - filling in the gaps, otherwise

RottenTomatoes.com - film criticism as Orwellian groupthink at its finest

Movie Review Query Engine - once you grasp its mighty powers, you'll never have to come back here again

BoxOfficeMojo - the best we've got for this sort of thing

Amazon.com - because buying through this link gives me money, and keeps me writing

 

Online critics who give a damn about stuff not released this week on 2000 screens

Strictly Film School - Erudite enough to make me feel downright populist, Acquarello's site is strictly auteurist, but has the sense not to include questionables like Spielberg. His DVD release schedule's indispensable for those of us blessed with a region free player. Proyas is inexplicably included on his "directors" page though. I mean, Jesus! 

Senses of Cinema - self proclaimed as "serious" and "eclectic"... not even I would do that...

The Film Experience - Come Awards-season, you'll be thanking me for pointing you toward Nat Roger's comprehensive site. I hope that his unfathomable C- for All the Real Girls doesn't sink Zooey's Oscar chances!

The FlickFilosopher - MaryAnn Johanson is the death of cinema. Like tons of morons, she calls Gigli the worst film of the year.

 

Not an HTML-aesthete? Here are some text-dominated sites that might be your best chance to find coverage on an obscure film:

To know where we're going, we must first know where we've been ...

Sean Choi's Peeping Sean - the first guy  to link to my website, as far as I can tell (LVJeff was the second, but he's all hung up on ethnic stereotypes in Freaky Friday while he embraces Bringin' Down the House). His site seems to be dead, but I can still knock him for loving Adaptation, I guess. 

Mike D'Angelo's The Man Who Viewed Too Much - he's got a fantastic, updated list of NYC's theatrical releases, which are much harder to keep track of than one might guess. Unfortunately he also thinks Charlotte Sometimes is awesome. Caveat emptor.

Theo Panayides' Theo's Century of Movies thoughtlessly gives Punch-Drunk Love a 66, apparently because he doesn't like the characters. Apparently, he needs more friends.

Steve Erickson's I, A Lame Critc for giving The Son ****.

Scott Tobias' Sweet Emulsion - Please choose one of the following: 1.) Charlie's Angels: Full Throtte = D    2.)  Gerry = A   3.) How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days = B-

Think I see a lot? Then you haven't witnessed baaab's insanity! Witness the insanity through his adoration of The Lizzie McGuire Movie!

Assuming Slant Magazine keeps it current, their film preview section will be indispensable. If only they could drop the endlessly snide tone over in the review section...

Zach Ralston grants a portal into Private Joker's Head, and gives it a 4/10. Worse yet, he gives Mulholland Drive a 2/10! Is there no God?!?!

Jared Sapolin is the most hated critic on the internet, and justifiably! The Age of Innocence = 29. The Age of Jared, Mentally = 12.

Jason Overbeck adores Adaptation, which basically means he adores shameless masturbation. 

Jaime Christley thinks Schindler's List is a masterpiece... *scoff*

This asshole totally raped Candyman.

And more ever-addictive screening log madness here (Les Bonnes Femmes = 26!), here (The Deer Hunter = "not terribly good"!), here (The Hours = 1!), here (Whale Rider = ****), here (The Wizard of Oz = 45!), and here (Punch-Drunk Love = C!).

 

Miscellany

CapAlert.com - on average funnier than The Onion

Feel like ranting online about movies? Good message boards await you at Rottentomatoes.com's "Critics Discussion" and Cinemarati Roundable, and DVDTalk (not really... they're all trolls nowadays...).

The Online Film Critics Society exists. I'm a member. What else can I say? If you want to get in, just copy my website.